Time is very slow for those who wait

So many people have the question: how did your visit go? And I thought, after telling about the fourth person today--my mom is right. Now is the time for a blog.

First, I will explain a few things for those of you that may not completely understand what is going on with me during this pregnancy. I have subchorionic hematoma (also known as subchorionic hemorrhage). I will explain and provide some links for those wanting more information.

A subchorionic hematoma, by definition:  Bleeding between the amniotic sac (membranes) and the pregnancy, usually found near the placenta.

I have included a picture for those of you who are visual people. The red is the hematoma, the pink P is the placenta, the pink lines around the rest is the chorion, and the blue is the amnion. 

Copyright © 2012 by American Roentgen Ray Society

This happens in 1% of all pregnancies (of all the "1%"'s for me to end up in, did it have to be in this one?), but 20% of pregnancies have bleeding in the first trimester. This is only found via ultrasound. Since I had large bleeds early on, I had a lot of ultrasounds and that is how this was found. I should clarify what I mean by "large bleed". I mean, you think you're dying. Bleeding to death via va-jay-jay. It's truly awful, and you're not only bleeding straight blood, but clots as well. I've passed around 9 clots to date.

Here is a link with more information:
http://www.whattoexpect.com/pregnancy/pregnancy-health/complications/subchorionic-bleeding.aspx
(Just as a disclaimer, I do not recommend reading What to Expect as a pregnant woman. There are much better, less scary and worrisome books on the market. I personally recommend Pregnancy Week by Week. There is a lovely husband/father book to go along with it. Moving on.)

And another link I like:
http://www.justmommies.com/articles/subchorionic-hematoma.shtml
(Not a medical journal)

You will notice neither of the links are medically associated. It is SO hard to find medical advice on SCH. It is almost nonexistent, as Dr. Sponagle and I discussed today. It is so very individualized. In my support group last week, 2 ladies had babies at 24 and 27 weeks. One (who has an SCH twice the size of mine) is at 35 weeks and doing well. Some ladies miscarry at 18-25 weeks. It is never a certainty. And while nothing ever is--it seems magnified when you're growing a tiny person in your uterus.

So we have no answers. We have no real advice but to take it easy, and then--when it gets worse--take it easier. Don't stress, they say. I get frustrated by the lack of knowledge surrounding SCH, and then I laugh when I think about it. It reminds me of my autoimmune disease. I've spent the last 14 years learning nothing from the doctors. I was diagnosed with a strange disease that no one could tell me why I have it, or what part exactly genetics played it in. It was 10 years later, when visiting with the geneticist after Seth's abnormal quad screen, that it was explained the best it ever has been: "Say you have a 52 card deck, which has 4 aces. You throw the the entire deck in the air, letting the cards land where they may. The likelihood the 4 aces land face up is the likelihood you should have gotten the autoimmune disease." That's the best answer I've gotten. There is no cure, just a management system involving medication. But management > death, so I will take management any day. With Seth, there were no answers either; 47 chromosomes instead of 46, preterm labor, late 2nd trimester bleeding...never any answers.

So fast forward to week 14 of my pregnancy (now). We are just going day to day, which is all we can do. My doctors visits aren't magic, they don't give me a lot of information because they don't have it. I know you all want to hear great news, and trust me so do I. But right now I just cannot give it to you. I don't have any news. My appointments with the OB are pretty much pointless, except for the fact they check my urine. We talk, enjoy banter, listen to the baby's heart beat (160bpm today), and I go home. My visits with the Peri are more in detail, because I always get an ultrasound. That means they are more expensive, too (hooray! lol).

I'm on bed rest now, because my SCH grew. It shouldn't be growing at this stage, it should be getting smaller or disappearing (according to what my doctors think). They also are watching my amniotic fluid, as the Peri wanted to see more than he did last time. However, it is known that if there are issues with placenta there can also be issues with the levels of amniotic fluid. At this point in time, Matt and I have decided to forego screenings. Knowing that the SCH can skew the results (which aren't usually that accurate anyway--look at Seth), we decided we are better off without it.

I hope this all makes sense, and please do not hesitate to ask any questions because if I know the answer I'd be glad to answer them. I get so many questions from friends and family wanting to know how I'm doing and what is going on, and sometimes I feel like I'm on repeat. From now on, I will be updating the blog after each appointment with news and weather forecast...wait wrong channel, just news from the doctors. I'm so thankful for all the loving people in my life that care so much about me, Matt, Seth & baby Bech. It's a blessing to have each of you along on this journey with us!

And therefore will the Lord wait, that he may be gracious unto you, and therefore will he be exalted, that he may have mercy upon you: for the Lord is a God of judgement: blessed are all they that wait for him. 
Isaiah 30:18